quesarah: (Default)
Intercourse, the penguin ([personal profile] quesarah) wrote2003-12-11 01:38 pm
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So work is generating lots of little crack monkeys who are dancing on top of my head while trying to suction my brains out of my ears. My head hurts, most people are tense, the other people are trying really hard to be chipper and inclusive, and I have far too much progesterone in my bloodstream to put up with this fucking shit.

Slimey D is at it again. Today he oozed by to whisper to me that "marketing is shooting another video in the lab. And they're set up right by your bench!" Like he's trying to wind me up, or something. I said thanks, but that's okay. I had to design primers anyway. That's all at the desk, not at the bench. He slithered off, visibly disappointed.

Baking cookies tomorrow will be Fun and Therapeutic. [livejournal.com profile] virginmartyr1 must entertain me with sordid (if fictional) stories about her exploits with [livejournal.com profile] mysassypants during college.

In other news, I looked at a draft (like, a fourth draft) of a Spike story from a month or so ago. Contrary to my opinion at that time, it does not suck the paint off a barn wall. I believe I shall clean it up and post it this weekend. La di da.

[identity profile] wafflelips.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 01:46 pm (UTC)(link)
I can kick his ass for you, if you want. Or hold him down while you kick his...

Why does he care about the video they aer shooting next to your bench? Why does it matter? He irritates me, even from afar.

No need to hear a story from virginmartyr#1 and mysassypants because w/ the info they've given me, I can make up a pretty good one myself.

Cool. Looking forward to seeing the story.

[identity profile] biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 02:26 pm (UTC)(link)
1. I don't know why he feels the need to do these things. Other than the theory you've already put forward, which is he's a slimey untrustworthy scumbucket.

2. I look forward to hearing both stories. The best story will receive a wonderful prize!

3. Groovy. I'll get my arse in gear then.

[identity profile] wafflelips.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 03:20 pm (UTC)(link)
1. Insecure and annoying.

2. We could come up with a really good story together. Maybe we'll throw in some maple so that we can foreshadow their initiation into the maple clique.

3. You do that.

[identity profile] biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 03:34 pm (UTC)(link)
1. Insecure, manipulative, and scheming

2. That could work. I'm sure there's some maple in there somewhere.

[identity profile] wafflelips.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 07:27 pm (UTC)(link)
2. I bet there is. And we'll make up exactly where it was.

[identity profile] virginmartyr1.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 01:58 pm (UTC)(link)
while i would love it if tomorrow was saturday and we were baking cookies/eating soup/drinking leftover alcohol/telling fun stories from college, tomorrow is only friday. beh. however, friday with holiday parties and yummy indian food, so it's not a total bust.

sorry that work is making the cranky monkeys come out and dance about. take a few deep breaths and realize that soon it will be the weekend and all will be well and good and fine. *big hugs* and if people keep bugging you, tell them they better stop or i'm gonna go kick them in the shins. that should take care of things right real quick.

i'm looking forward to reading the spike story (just wrote barn story...not sure why. oh right because it doesn't suck paint of the barn wall. my brain got confuse-ed). i'm sure it's marvelous. :)

[identity profile] biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 02:27 pm (UTC)(link)
Fucking fuckity fuck. I have to wait TWO days. I'm trying to block out the fact that we're supposed to have "team lunch" with the new boss' group tomorrow. Oh yay, such joy.

But there will be Indian food and yoga fun tomorrow. Small favors, eh?

[identity profile] virginmartyr1.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 02:53 pm (UTC)(link)
i'm sorry today is only thursday. this is the week that won't say die. it's felt like the end of the week since monday. maybe team lunch won't be horrible? do you get to go home after team lunch? if so, call me. i should be home by 3. wheee. (however, this means i actually need to get a largely significant amount of work done in the next 3 hours so i don't have to come back to the office tomorrow afternoon. drat).

But there will be Indian food and yoga fun tomorrow. Small favors, eh?

yay for small favors. and by the time indian food and yoga fun rolls around it will be the weekend...and THEN it'll be time for saturday cookie/etc fun-ness.

damn, i'm chipper today. it's a nice holiday from cranky and grumpy, but i'm worried. did someone slip me some anti-depressant or something. i should not question, i should just go along with chipper feeling. yay

[identity profile] biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 03:09 pm (UTC)(link)
do you get to go home after team lunch?

Oh hell no. Back to work, get some more data out. *sigh*

damn, i'm chipper today. it's a nice holiday from cranky and grumpy, but i'm worried. did someone slip me some anti-depressant or something.

Ours is not to question why. Ours is to roll with it and enjoy it.

[identity profile] king-ghidorah.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 06:00 pm (UTC)(link)
Ours is not to question why. Ours is to roll with it and enjoy it.

That's altogether the wrong attitude for the workplace. You need to buck up and focus on the right sort of corporate slogan. Like a Successories poster:



Teamwork


Ours is not to question why.
Ours is to shut up and do what the corporate office tells us to do.
Or else our office will be downsized and our jobs shipped overseas.

[identity profile] virginmartyr1.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 06:53 pm (UTC)(link)
LOL. ok that's way too sad but true for so many people.

[identity profile] among-the-waves.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 02:05 pm (UTC)(link)
The crack monkeys AND the server gnomes need to go play outside. They are evil, but they might like each other enough and not have to be bothering us all day.

[identity profile] biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 02:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Let's do it. We'll set up a play date for them.

*blink*

How do we do that?

[identity profile] among-the-waves.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 02:42 pm (UTC)(link)
I think the server gnomes like it if I leave out printouts of data for them to chew on. Maybe I could lure them outside with that. Or maybe I could take one of the dead servers and set it outside, because there are probably still some gnomes running around inside of it.

As far as crack monkeys... I dunno. You might need some crack for that, and I don't want to see you get busted for trying to buy some crack.

[identity profile] biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 02:54 pm (UTC)(link)
Don't need crack. I'll just print out some data, or set up some reactions, and the crack monkeys will come along to mess everything up.

They provide their own crack. No worries for me.

[identity profile] spacey-lee.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 02:37 pm (UTC)(link)
Sorry work is of the suck. Mine got better today. I have been a bad little worker but I did manage to get some coding done. Woo. And now I found out the script I had planned to write won't work because the file is in columns using SPACES instead of TABS and that makes it difficult to parse. Oh well.

Anyway, your guy sounds like more of an ass than my G. Not only will your loved ones kick his ass or his shins, I will personally fly down to San Diego and spray him with a water gun full of maple. Lemme tell you, maple is fun to consume but it is the worst to have over your entire body. I will then throw feathers, furballs and kitty litter at him. He will be covered due to the sticky nature of maple. He will cry and ask me to stop and I will but not without giving him a Cosby Show talk about how it isn't nice to be slimey and a scumbucket. He will apologize, take a shower and bow at your feet.

I have a plan. My plan works.

[identity profile] biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 02:47 pm (UTC)(link)
Ack. I would never have known that SPACES are harded to parse than TABS. Heck, you got some coding done. And got the satisfaction of slacking a bit. All is well.

Thanks for your detailed and oh so effective plan for revenge on Slimey D. I'm sure he will be openly weeping by the end of your Cosby Show talk, begging forgiveness for his behavior. I look forward to having him bow at my feet. More people should bow at my feet. Yes, they should.

Come up with a plan of action for that, eh?

[identity profile] virginmartyr1.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 02:49 pm (UTC)(link)
after careful consideration, i think your plan wins the grand prize of best plan. but can i still kick him in the shins first. that'll catch him off guard so you can spray him with maple. we're collaborating. yay!

[identity profile] spacey-lee.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 03:01 pm (UTC)(link)
Sounds good to me. And if the shin kicking doesn't work, you can always knock him in the head with a flutter board. Those things can do damage!

I have always thought more people should bow at your feet, [livejournal.com profile] biogeekgrrl. I don't know why they don't. People these days. Geesh. And heavens to Betsey too.

[identity profile] biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 03:07 pm (UTC)(link)
Geesh. And heavens to Betsey too.

Indeedy-diddly-do.

[identity profile] wafflelips.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 03:18 pm (UTC)(link)
She is royalty. I know. Cuz I am, too. Us royals, we stick together.

[identity profile] gossip-ho.livejournal.com 2003-12-12 10:15 pm (UTC)(link)
If all else fails, I'll be standing right beside you with a baseball bat ready to strike!

[identity profile] biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com 2003-12-13 08:34 am (UTC)(link)
There's so much love in this room. *sniffles*

[identity profile] king-ghidorah.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 06:03 pm (UTC)(link)
Lemme tell you, maple is fun to consume but it is the worst to have over your entire body.

You Canadians sure throw some wild parties.

[identity profile] spacey-lee.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 06:17 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, it's that Canadian beer. It goes right to your head.

[identity profile] biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com 2003-12-11 07:17 pm (UTC)(link)
They have long winters. What else is there to do?