life is so unfair

[quesarah]

This morning, I had my PAP and a shot in the arm. This is so unfair. I totally deserve a lollipop.

Comments

[zazuomgwtf.livejournal.com]

You certainly do!

[biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com]

One of these days, when the doctor tells me "I'm just going to put two fingers in you" I'll work up the nerve to tell them "feel lucky, most people have to buy me dinner before they get to do that."

[woe2you.livejournal.com]

Hang on, that's occurred to you and you've not said it? What's wrong with you?

[biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com]

Um, it's the whole bit where I'm buck naked under a paper sheet with my legs in the stirrups, and the doctor between my legs. Somehow it just takes the piss right outta me.

[woe2you.livejournal.com]

But it's easy to make with the mouth when you're feeling in control. It's when you're not that's the real challenge.

[biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com]

Yes, sensei.

[woe2you.livejournal.com]

Oh splendid, now I'm the Mr Miyagi of motormouths? I'm underwhelmed by the honour you bestow upon me.

[biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com]

Could be worse; I could be comparing you to Arnold from Happy Days.

[woe2you.livejournal.com]

You could, yes. But I think you have a survival instinct.

[biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com]

Um, Chris? There's an ocean and a continent and several time zones between us. I ain't skeered of you. :p

[woe2you.livejournal.com]

You also forgot the important, nay pivotal fact that I'm a complete wuss.

[biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com]

Well, I didn't want to insult your manliness. But now you mention it...

[woe2you.livejournal.com]

Really? Wow. First time for everything...

[biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com]

Notice how long it lasted.

[woe2you.livejournal.com]

It's for the best. I react funny to unfamiliar behaviour. On top of that, I'd only have suspected you of being a pod person or something.

[biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com]

Well, I did just get probed...

[woe2you.livejournal.com]

I know. Which is why, instead of biting, I'll just sit here and gloat.

[king-ghidorah.livejournal.com]

Yes, it is hard to be a smartass when someone is placing a digit in your orifices. The best I ever got (while undergoing a different probe) was when the doc told me to tell him if I experienced any discomfort was to ask, "relative to what?" His response was, "well, any unexpected discomfort." Being a smartass is less effective when the doc is equally sardonic.

I did really throw off a nurse giving me a gamma glob shot when she asked, "do you feel any discomfort?" and I answered "besides having a needle in my ass?" I'm not sure they expect you to mouth off. So think of it as making their day more interesting.

[biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com]

You know, I think it would be very comforting to have a doc who was just as sardonic as I. I could relate to a person like that and subsequently would be more comfortable.

I'm not sure they expect you to mouth off. So think of it as making their day more interesting.

I will, that's a good way to frame it. It's my sworn duty to bring a little levity and sarcasm into their dreary existence. ;)

I will say that on the way out, I complained to the nurse about getting both a PAP and a shot: didn't I deserve a lollipop? She laughed and told me there was a candy dish near the nurses' station.

[scrump.livejournal.com]

[biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com]

Hee! All better. :)

[among-the-waves.livejournal.com]

It could be worse. You could have gotten a PAP, a shot in the arm, and a kick in the aaaaasss.

Surfing, brah? I have off from the pager beastie on Sunday. I may also go Sometime on Saturday.

[biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com]

Surfing, brah. Sunday is all clear. :)

[among-the-waves.livejournal.com]

OK, let's plan for Sunday morning. I'm not sure what my plans (if any) with D are for Saturday night so I don't know when/where I'll be the next morning... I'll get in touch tomorrow or early Saturday and let you know.

[biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com]

Groovy. I'm looking forward to it. :)

[madenglishbloke.livejournal.com]

im lucky enough to have never been abducted by aliens, so have never had to submit to any of these probings...
however, when admitted to hospital a few months ago after a major asthma attack, i was asked if i had any allergies - to which i replied "needles".
when asked if there were any other allergies, i said "yeah - nurses with needles".
"oh yeah - hospitals", i added.
what is it about cute nurses that makes you want to gob off, to make them think your not scared, when in reality, youre cacking it...

[biogeekgrrl.livejournal.com]

Nurses are cool and competent and they see all kinds of icky stuff. It's natural to want to impress them. Plus, you have to maintain some sense of cool when they have their instruments in your orifices.

[king-ghidorah.livejournal.com]

Plus nurses are to men as firefighters are to women. It's just the way it is.